How life changes in an instant.

My title says it all. I am 33 years old and lost my wonderful, amazing husband, Wayne Pedrick 3 weeks ago tonight. It was very sudden and totally unexpected. It is the worst day of my life and can't imagine life being worse.
Everyone tells me to write and talk about my feelings and hopefully it will help me work thru the pain I am feeling.
Our life was wonderful. We have the most beautiful little boy and he will be on on June 1st. I am very sad that Wayne will not physically be here to celebrate the 2nd most exciting day of my life. The 1st was marrying him.
Wayne was and still remains to be my best friend. We did everything together. We were two peas in a pod. While my husband knew everyone in the world, we enjoyed just being together and even happier with the birth of our son.
I am heartbroken, lonely and afraid. One day I was 1/2 of a whole and now I am just a broken half and don't know how or what life is going to be like without Wayne here everyday.
I am so thanful for our son. He truly is handsome and amazing. He is such a happy baby and Wayne enjoyed every moment he had with Ryan, even when he was cranky.
Tonight is especially hard for me because it is 3 weeks ago tonight that my world came to an abrupt horrible halt. It is also a year ago tonight at almost the same time that I started to go into labor with our son. I was so excited and decided to let Wayne sleep and not disturb him, as he worked hard during the day and I still had a long way to go.
I was blessed with a short labor and everything went perfect. We didn't know the sex of our child and I was elated when he was born and Wayne told me we had a son. A son is cool. He gets to carry on the family name. We fell in love with him instantly. We had so many dreams and plans and things to do with Ryan.
I am greatful that Wayne got to spend almost a whole year with Ryan. We went everywhere. We went on mini vacations and to the shore, parades and such. Ryan is a flirt and Wayne enjoyed watching him flirt and pick up all the ladies wherever we went.
I'm sure this blog is going to be reallllly long and take a long time to write, but I hope this helps me feel better by writing it and telling the world how much of a wonderful man Wayne Pedrick is and was and how many lives he touched.
I have never met another person with the pride, integrity and love that he had. Wayne was an honest, passionate and giving person. He would help anyone and not ask for anything in return.
He would go without and put others before his needs. He was caring, loving and strong yet gentle. Wayne was a "mans man." Everyone liked to be around him and he knew everyone.
This is going to be really tough for me, but if anyone reads this, I hope when they are done reading, they will understand the love we shared, how wonderful Wayne was and how devistated I am without him.
Okay, so here is my story:

I met Wayne Pedrick in 1991. I was 18 almost turning 19. He was a police Sergeant and very handsome. Our first encounter was at a party that got a bit out of control and they were called. I got my first glimpse of him.
About a week later, I had left a friend's wedding and the drive of the vehicle I was in, got pulled over. We ended up at the police station. (I know this isn't looking good for me, but I was never in trouble or a trouble maker) I saw Wayne again. He was getting of duty and wearing light grey champion shorts and a light pink shark tournament fishing shirt. (I have a good memory)
About a month or so later, I was leaving work and had a cold. It was 2am and I had to get something to feel better. (It was July, hot and sucked to be sick)
I went to the closest store that was open and made my purchase. As I walked out, there he was, in his unmarked police car. He said "What, your a snot and you can't say Hi?" I stood there and we talked for awhile. We ended up talking all night long. I was hooked. He was more than I imagined. I knew from that night on, we were ment to be together.